• "Testie"
• Channels Inca coffee Gods
• Once a cosmetic test subject, is now Unkle Boob's sidekick, usually gets kicked in the crotch.
• The monkey on this monkey's back is Coffee Coffee Coffee.
• Favorite saying: "Coffee coffee coffee is only a catch and release program."
  

Unkel Boob's private brain bucket specialist. Trains Sock Monkey and is the author of the best selling book "Are you on medication yet?"

Hobbies are:

• Do-in old-fashioned lobotomies & electroshock therapy
• Color-coordinating colored pills
  with people's cars
• Not blinking for days on end
• Favorite saying: "The only reality is the one who's check is good."

Oxygen deprived jack-in-the-box. Demented pyro - his hand was blown off long ago. Says he got the Barbie Jeep in an amicable break up with Barbie, but he smells of burnt plastic and avoids the subject.

Hobbies are:

• Burning and exploding things for Unkel Boob
• Burning and exploding things Unkel Boob doesn't need burnt or exploded
  
• Collects bumper stickers like "Fire is the devil's only friend", "Burn baby burn, disco inferno", and "Light me, I'm topped off with refried beans and Bock Beer"

Smokey-da-Bear wants to gut him and eat his flesh

Pinee

Ripped sawed from a piece of scotch pine. He claims to be the illegitimate son of Charlie McCarthy. Handles e-mail and clog dances 28 1/2 words a minute.

Hobbies are:

• Stomping carpenter ants into goo.
• Collecting fossilized Frosty the Snowman turds.

Once kicked a clog dancer to death over the honor of his girlfriend.